I thirst

“I thirst” (John 19:28)

Two weeks ago I felt like going for a run. It was late morning on a Saturday and so I thought it would be cool. I went outside and began my work out. I did not take any water with me and after a while, I realized that it was really too hot to run without being properly hydrated or having water with me. After I was about a mile and a half away from home, I was so thirsty. All I could think about was how thirsty I was, how dry and uncomfortable my mouth felt, how achy my body felt and tired I was.

This was the moment I heard the words, “I thirst,” resound in my mind. I began to contemplate His thirst on the Cross and I realized that I wanted to be thirsty. So I continued to run until I began to feel sick. I was terribly dehydrated when I crossed a small bridge standing over some stagnant water filled with algae and bacteria. Despite how disgusting it looked, all I could think of was my thirst and how much I wanted to drink it. Sure the water would have surely made me sick, but it would have satisfied the aching dryness of my mouth and perhaps cooled me for a time.

I prayed to God to give me the strength to make it home for as far out as I had gone, I still had to turn around to get home. For the reminder of my time outside, I contemplated Christ’s words, “I thirst.” This was when I decided to write these reflections. I made a vow to God to spend my Holy Week reflecting on His Sacrifice for us and how better to do that than reflect on His last words to us on the Cross?

So now I ask you, what did Christ mean when he said, “I Thirst”? It does seem like a strange thing to say. I mean everything else He has said thus far, as I have reflected upon them, have shown us our sinfulness and His redeeming love for us. So do we really think He was just telling us that He was biologically thirsty?

Before we address this question, I want to take a quick detour. The purpose of my blog is to find hope in a world of suffering, and so it would be befitting for me to address this. In Matthew 27:34, we are told that Jesus is given wine mixed with gall before they crucified Him but that He refused to drink it. Gall was actually used to numb pain. He could have taken a deep drink of this so that maybe the pain of the nails driving into His flesh and His tortured body hanging from the Cross would have been dulled. Maybe His crucifixion would not have been so painful; maybe He would not have suffered as much. But He refused to drink it.

What can this tell us about suffering? Christ sacrificed Himself on the Cross for us; He suffered in atonement for our sins. He had to suffer for this great act of redemption. Without human suffering we would not be saved.

With that said, let us return to the reflection on “I Thirst.” There are two very important things going on when Jesus tells us of His Thirst. First is an allusion to the First Passover and please remember that Jesus was crucified on Passover, this was why they broke the knees of the other men and pierced Him with a spear. The men had to be removed and their bodies attended to prior to Passover beginning. So, how does this relate to Passover?

Exodus 12:21-23 says, “Moses called all the elders of Israel and said to them, ‘Go and procure lambs for your families, and slaughter them as Passover victims. Then take a bunch of hyssop, and dipping it in the blood that is in the basin, sprinkle the lintel and the two doorposts with this blood. But none of you shall go outdoors until morning. For the LORD will go by, striking down the Egyptians. Seeing the blood on the lintel and the two doorposts, the LORD will pass over that door and not let the destroyer come into your houses to strike you down.’”

Psalm 51:7-12

“True, I was born guilty, a sinner, even as my mother conceived me.
Still, you insist on sincerity of heart; in my inmost being teach me wisdom.

Cleanse me with hyssop, that I may be pure;
wash me, make me whiter than snow.

Let me hear sounds of joy and gladness; let the bones you have crushed rejoice. Turn away your face from my sins; blot out all my guilt.

A clean heart create for me, God; renew in me a steadfast spirit.”

So what is the connection? Hyssop! Hyssop was used to mark the homes which the destroyer would pass over and then used again to cleanse the Psalmist from his sins. And how is this related to Jesus?

“After this, aware that everything was now finished, in order that the scripture might be fulfilled, Jesus said, "I thirst." There was a vessel filled with common wine. So they put a sponge soaked in wine on a sprig of hyssop and put it up to his mouth” (John 19:28-29).

He said, “I Thirst” in order to fulfill scripture. The Roman guards reacted to His statement by giving Him wine soaked on a sponge upon a sprig of Hyssop. Wine, what we now know to be the Blood of Christ and Christ, the Paschal Lamb. The Blood of Christ, shed to cleanse us of our sins. What an awesome message in two little words!

But there is still another aspect of this that is more beautiful. We know why Christ said He thirsts, but do we know what He thirsted for? Actually, I learned this just recently during my Parish Priest’s homily on The Woman at the Well (John 4). Do you recall that in my reflection on Jesus’ Third Saying, “Woman, Behold your son…” (John 19:26-27), I mentioned that John’s Gospel is also known as the Gospel of Love?

Well, my priest, Fr. Alejandro, was the first to point this out to me. In His homily on the Woman at the Well, he spoke of the woman’s thirst. What was she thirsty for and why could nothing ever satisfy her thirst? She was thirsty for love and she was looking in all the wrong places. Jesus said He could give her a drink of Living Water so that she would never thirst again- The Love of God. Yes, this is also a reference to the Holy Spirit, but one understanding of the Spirit is the He is the Love between the Father and the Son. She thirsts for Love.

Then Fr. Alejandro drew the parallel to Jesus’ Fifth Word, “I Thirst.” What did Jesus Thirst for? What does He still Thirst for? Our Love.

Psalm 69:19-21

You know the insults I receive, and my shame and dishonor; my foes are all known to you. Insults have broken my heart, so that I am in despair.

I looked for pity, but there was none; and for comforters, but I found none.
They gave me poison for food, and for my thirst
they gave me vinegar to drink.

Another translation of Psalm 69:20 is “I looked for love and I found none.”

He wants our love but instead we give Him vinegar. This reminds me of my thirst when I was running. I wanted cool, clean, sweet water but I was so thirsty, I maybe would have settled for the stagnant water that would have certainly made me ill.

How often do we live our lives searching for love, happiness, success, money, etc.? These things do not lead to true happiness. They are not bad things, but if we make our lives all about obtaining these things and forget He who is true and authentic Joy, than we are doing no better than drinking stagnant water. It will make us spiritually ill.

“For God so loved the world that he gave his only Son, so that everyone who believes in him might not perish but might have eternal life”
(John 3:16).

Jesus died on the cross so that we might live, he suffered without accepting the numbing gall, so that He would be sure to feel the pain completely, He suffered without guilt because of His great, absolute and infinite Love for us. Despite that we are ignoring Him, taunting Him, wounding Him and betraying Him, He never stops giving to us.

He gives us Salvation, His Mother, and His never ending Love. All He asks in return is for us to love Him too.

Oh my Jesus, I come into your presence so aware of my human frailty and yet overwhelmed by your love for me. You carried your cross to sacrifice your life to redeem mine because of your love for me.
A love which I do not deserve for all the times I abandoned you
and sought out worldly substitutions for Your Love.

But today I choose to love you with my whole heart, and I ask your pardon, oh Lord, for my sins against you. My Most Beloved Jesus, please forgive me. Please help my love for you to grow more and more every day and teach me to rest in that love.

Please allow me to stand at the foot of the cross with you and to quench your thirst by loving you. You died on the cross for love of me; and so I offer my life to you, My Beloved. To you, oh God, I lift up my soul and
give to you all that I am, but most importantly, I give you my love
and I accept your Love for me.
Amen.

“As long as you do not know in a very intimate way
that Jesus is thirsty for you, it will be impossible for you
to know who He wants to be for you,
nor who He wants you to be for Him.”
- Blessed Mother Theresa of Calcutta


For additional reflection of Christ's Thirst for our Love, please read Behold the Heart of Jesus that Thirst for souls.

Sources:
http://www.mcpriests.com/03_I_thirst_Shroud_EN.htm
http://www.catholicapologetics.info/library/sacredheart/trulve.htm
http://www.fpclive.org/sermons10/S_Mar21_10.pdf
http://www.biblecenter.com/sermons/sevensayingsfromthecrossithirst.htm